Recovering from birth is not a one-size-fits-all process. While some may feel ready to jump back into their usual routine quickly, others will need more time to heal physically and emotionally. Whether you've had a natural birth, a caesarean, or any other birth experience, your body has undergone significant change. The more you can embrace patience with your body, the more gentle and supportive you’ll find your recovery.

In these early weeks, your body will gradually repair and realign, which might mean a slower pace than you’d anticipated. Instead of setting strict timelines for “bouncing back,” try setting small, achievable goals. Simple steps, like staying hydrated, nourishing yourself, and prioritising rest, are powerful foundations that make a difference to your wellbeing.

The New Normal of Sleep (Or Lack Thereof)

Sleep is one of the most challenging aspects of life with a newborn. Babies have their own unique rhythms, often waking every couple of hours to feed or simply for comfort. During this time, it’s important to remember that a lack of sleep is temporary and normal – even if it doesn’t always feel that way at 2am.

If possible, enlist the help of friends, family, or a partner to share the load. While every parent’s circumstances differ, the fourth trimester is an ideal time to explore what "support" means for you. Even brief rest breaks, where you close your eyes and recharge, can help build resilience.

Letting Go of Perfectionism

One of the most liberating things you can do for yourself in the fourth trimester is let go of any idea of being the “perfect” parent. The pressures of a spotless home, perfectly balanced meals, or an immediate return to all pre-baby routines can create stress and hinder recovery. Instead, focus on what matters most – bonding with your baby and tending to your own recovery.

A gentle way to let go of perfectionism is by reminding yourself that this period is temporary and doesn’t need to look or feel a certain way. A messy home, quick meals, or skipping tasks are often necessary adaptations to make space for healing and family time. Celebrate each small win rather than feeling weighed down by a checklist of expectations.

Prioritising Self-Care

The concept of self-care often feels distant or difficult to achieve with a newborn in your arms. However, self-care in the fourth trimester doesn’t need to be elaborate. Small acts, like a moment with a cup of tea, a warm shower, or a short walk, can make a real difference. Lean into any opportunity to rest and nurture yourself, knowing these moments are invaluable for building your energy and resilience.

Consider incorporating practices that nurture your mind as well as your body. Taking five minutes to meditate, journal, or practice mindfulness can help bring a sense of calm amidst the ups and downs. And remember, there’s no guilt in taking time for yourself – a well-cared-for parent is better able to care for their baby.

Seeking Support and Building Your Village

During the fourth trimester, building a supportive network is invaluable. Reach out to friends, family, or local support groups. Many parents find that connecting with others who are also in this phase – either through parenting groups or community catch-ups – offers reassurance and perspective.

Professional support, like a lactation consultant, midwife, or postpartum doula, can also be invaluable, providing guidance and expertise during this critical period. If you’re struggling with physical healing, feeding, or feeling overwhelmed, know that reaching out for help is a sign of strength and self-compassion.

Giving Yourself Grace

The fourth trimester is a journey of both joy and adjustment, and it’s completely normal to have highs and lows. Give yourself grace in this period. Whether you’re overwhelmed, exhausted, or emotional, know that it’s okay to feel everything as it comes. Each day brings new experiences and challenges, so take it one step at a time, celebrating each victory – no matter how small.

If you feel yourself becoming discouraged or burdened by expectations, pause and remind yourself that you are learning and growing right alongside your baby. There is no “right” way to navigate these first few months, and giving yourself permission to do what feels best for you and your baby will foster more confidence as time goes on.